OurHmm Let’s Think It Over Tour of America, Part I,is in full rumination burble until next week whenPart IIcommences.
We ruminated so hard that an unexpected category emerged raw out of Lake Nighthorse in broad daylight: Least Popular Sport in the World. It’s Paddleboard Polo! The game has never actually been played because nobody gives a crap. Paddleboarders want to paddle around and ruminate. They don’t want to flail in an unstable plastic rectangle anchored at the baby end of the solar system. They want to goof off and stand up and paddle around and sit down and look around.
A Rare Opportunity To Play The Game Nobody Has Ever Played
[As of press time, nothing happened.]
The vehicle of a person obviously uninterested in Paddleboard Polo.
[That doesn’t mean we understand the psychopathic sunflower.
Or the apparent decapitation with scissors on the driver’s side. Or the vanity plate.]
New Idea of the Week: We are thinking about founding a Thing Tank.
It will be about 1,200 cubic meters, which is probably smaller than a puny opera house. It will be above water, accessible from the top, and painted exciting Rumination Red. It will not have shelving. Placements will be made at the top, whereupon gravity will deliver them expeditiously to the bottom. On first-come, first-serve basis. Call ahead for times available.
Disclaimer: the tank may get wet later. We're not saying right now.
Fictionary Friday: Words You Need. Whether you know it or not.
Phenonenonenon(fenn non enn non enn non) Noun: A major game that never ends and then you die without knowing who won.
In a sentence:At their annual meeting, the Paddleboard Polo Association failed to launch a phenonenonenon because nobody would play the freakin' "game".
Fizzdom Friday: from our collection of favorite quotes.
"Man, if you have to ask what it is, you'll never know." – Louis Armstrong, when asked to define jazz.
Wikipedia Friday Favorite: In honor of the intersection of curiosity and logarithmically expanding human knowledge, we offer a weekly favorite obscure Wikipedia page. The Amazing Criswell could have popularized Paddleboard Polo but he
died a couple decades before the game was universally spurned (coincident with its inception).
Friday Fluff: This just in: Adhesion is an emotion. You get stuck to stuff and people and places before you even think about it. The less you think about it, the more obvious it is: we all adhere to other people and things, and the stickage bonds like Vell and Crow.
Write if you (do) or (do not) get stuck ruminating and forget to play a game.
