Happy Presidents Day Week! We celebrated with appropriate, patriotic fervor at Star Spangled Linens and bought a fitted top sheet with a stunning bronze Millard Fillmore motif, thread count 101, for only $17.76 (with the loyalty pledge-of-allegiance discount). What did you buy?
Our recent ~~~ tilde ~~~ extravaganza has already enriched lives in more than one time zone. We thought we couldn’t outdo ourselves, but we were wrong! Look! Now do this: Hold down the option key, and hit the x key.
Fictionary Friday: This week we celebrate a pair of words that are more closely related than ≈≈ double tildes ≈≈ and linens.
Dogsplaining (dog splay ning) Verb: Trying to convince your pet that you are sane.
Caflicted (caff lick ted) Noun: Dogs that hate cats but can’t stop eating cat shit.
In a sentence:
While Chanda Lier*dogsplained the lack of a proper sanitation plan to her cat, Dimbulb, she
was inadvertently rescued from failure by the delightful benefits of the cafliction addiction relished by Flapjack, the neighborhood pug.
* Pet owner's name, thanks to Christina Price Washington, Atlanta, GA
Fizzdom Friday: from our collection of favorite quotes.
"Irresponsibility is part of the pleasure of all art; it is the part the schools cannot recognize." – James Joyce
Wikipedia Friday Favorite + Reader Reply Combo:
This week’s entry from Tom Kelley of Moro Bay, California:
Other Big News: Since our Help Desk is down (should be back up by Arbor Day if you’re Gemini), we are announcing our New Free Service: If you’re not sure if something is funny or not, send it in with a bottle of wine. (A nice burgundy, perhaps.) We have a team of snap judges on staff who are on call with snap judgments, and the wine tasting might help your ranking.
All the best, see ya soon, write if you (do) or (do not) run into Flapjack. OKAllright, Jonathan www.jonathanmarcus.org
PS: (Get on it, people! Join the race to the bottom for next week! Hit "Reply" to send us your Fictionary, Fizzdom, Fluff or Wiki!)
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